How To Explain American Politics To An Eight-Year-Old

Kid: Daddy, how did Barrack Obama get elected?

Daddy: Mikey, that's a very good question. Would you like Daddy to explain how that happened?

Kid: Yes, very much!

Daddy: OK, but you have to listen carefully. This gets a little confusing.

Kid: OK, I will.

Daddy: Everything starts with the Circle Talkers (Liberals) trying to fool the Moron Class (Independents and Moderates) into thinking they are intelligent and to follow them by saying things that the Moron Class can't understand. The Moron Class thinks this means the Circle Talkers are much smarter than they are, but in reality the Circle Talkers don't really know what they are saying either.
The Fools (Mainstream Media) help the Circle Talkers by claiming they have the best ideas and telling the Moron Class how bad those evil Straight Talkers (Conservatives) are. The Straight Talkers attempt to refute this notion through Truth Outlets (Right Wing Media), however, the Fools and Circle Talkers combine forces with one another in an attempt to convince the Moron Class that the Straight Talkers and their Truth Outlets are actually liars - even though they know they are not.
Eventually, the Moron Class makes up their mind and votes for the the Circle Talker or the Straight Talker. Last year, they voted for the Circle Talker and that is how Barrack Obama became President.
Do you understand all of that Mikey?

Kid: Yeah, I guess. Was there a moral to that story Daddy?

Daddy: There was son. The moral of the story is that the leader of the free world was elected by Morons.

Brilliant.

Via FL Pundit